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Text messages always seem to be at the center of controversy when it comes to relationships and learning how to get your ex back. Some so called “experts” suggest any attempt to text your ex back after a breakup is a bad idea. Others like Michael Fiore, author of the downloadable PDF eBook, Text Your Ex Back, see text messaging as a very powerful way to reconnect and build a new relationship with your ex.

So who’s right and who’s wrong?

Well, both and neither. The question of right and wrong isn’t really the right question to ask.

Trying to text your ex back after a breakup can be both a good idea or a bad one depending on how you go about it. Text messaging itself isn’t bad, but most people go about it the wrong way and end up coming across as needy, desperate, and insecure or they put too much pressure on their ex through the messages they send and end up pushing them further away.

Text Your Ex Back – How To Craft Your First Few Text Messages

When you start sending text messages to your ex, you’ll have much better success if you focus on a few key points. These are:


  • Avoid nothing texts.
  • Create a positive experience.
  • Offer a subtle compliment.
  • Avoid putting pressure on your ex to respond.


First, when trying to text your ex back, you want to avoid sending “nothing” texts. These are texts like “Hi” or “Hey, what’s up?” that don’t really say anything. If it’s something you’d shoot your buddy when you’re bored, then it’s probably a nothing text.

Here are some example text messages that are much better alternatives.


  • “I just heard Katy Perry is coming to Seattle this summer. It made me smile because I bet you’re super excited. Hope you’re doing great.”
  • “I just saw the cutest kittens at the pet store. It made me think of you because I know how much you love those little furballs. I hope you’re having a fantastic weekend.”
  • “I just watched the new Jeff Dunham comedy show. It really문자발송 made me laugh thinking about your Achmed impression. I’m glad we’re still friends.”


Do you see a pattern emerging? All these texts have several things in common.

First, they suggest you stumbled upon something positive that made you think of your ex (the positive experience). Next, they offer a subtle compliment. The key word here is “subtle”.

You don’t want to come out and say something like, “You’re so super hot.” Instead, the compliment here is something to the effect of “thinking about you made me smile or laugh”.

Lastly, the above text message examples don’t put any pressure on your ex to respond. They don’t ask a question. They don’t talk about the relationship. If your ex responds, cool. If not, no big deal. There’s no pressure.

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